I Can Do It With A Broken Heart
I had a phone call from my dad just a few minutes ago. I’ve already taken my lunch and my parents both had physical therapy, so I figured I would just talk to them on my way home. See, I am Hispanic. Naturally, one parent doesn’t care what I do (my mom) and the other parent is obsessed with making sure I am ok at all times (my dad). Because of this dynamic, I try to make sure I call them at least once a day so that they know I’m alive.
My dad surprised me with a call to tell me how proud he is of me - as a woman, daughter, and mother. See, when my ex-husband left us, it wasn’t that I did not break down. I broke down quite a lot. It’s that I never stopped moving.
When he left…
I was a stay-at-home parent. So, I secured and started a job within two weeks.
I was dependent on his income. So, I rose through, not one, but two promotions in order to release my dependence on his child support.
I was an insecure and emotionally broken person. So, I began counseling two months after he left in an effort to work through my feelings and emotions and build my self-confidence.
I was worried about what he thought about pretty much everything. As a happy consequence of counseling, I learned to feel secure in my parenting and relationship with my girls. I no longer allowed his thoughts and opinions to matter. After all, I am the one who is truly parenting them.
I was frozen in my education. So, I began taking classes while working full-time.
I am in constant movement and I try my very hardest not to lose momentum.
In the words of Taylor Swift:
I can hold my breath
I’ve been doing it since he left
Well, I’m not holding my breath anymore, but you get the point.
'Cause I'm a real tough kid, I can handle my shit
They said, "Babe, you gotta fake it till you make it" and I did
Lights, camera, bitch smile, in stilettos for miles
He said he'd love me for all time
But that time was quite short
Breaking down, I hit the floor
All the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting "More"
I was grinning like I'm winning, I was hitting my marks
'Cause I can do it with a broken heart (one, two, three)
